general
You know there are certain things, or basically most of the things that you don' plan but it happens nevertheless,
like a gush of wild wind blowing away at your face, indicating its presence, indicating its heavy presence.
Depression hit me just like that, outta nowhere at my darkest hour more than a year ago.
The time, to be precise the day when my girlfriend broke up with me, the day one of my closest friends died, and my so-called best friend abandoned me.
Seems pretty rough right? Trust me, it wasn't that bad, In fact, I didn't feel a thing, to be honest.
Things just happened and I didn't know how to react, my body failed me that day and I believe I was immune to every emotion this world has to offer.
Fast forward to this year, the late winter was trying to scare us away with its coldness and Spring was trying it's hard to spread life, spread life into me.
And so I met her, outta nowhere.
The person, the girl responsible for my redemption was just another ordinary girl in my class, Sitting alone, reading a book as if just like me, the real world people didn't interest her.
And so she interests me.
Back in the day, I had just started this blog and creating stories were my first priority, maybe that was my chance to Redemption I thought?
Seeing her, her eyes, the way she moved, the way she laughed, the way she behaved and most importantly her voice, that voice, made me feel something I hadn't felt for anyone in about 4 years.
Was it love? I have no idea since I didn't know her.
You can't fall in love with a person you don't know.
This was something else.
Who was she?
She was my Kumi Ishikawa.
The same Kumi Ishikawa that gave birth to a so-called story "Life is a cherry Blossom tree", Kumi Ishikawa which made me revive a person called Rin Kobayashi.
And so one summer evening, when I missed her.
I imagined a version of her in my mind, an alternate reality which I penned down on a piece of paper in my parent's bedroom back at home.
That was the very first night in months, I had a good sleep.
You know when you believe you are a talentless piece of crap with absolutely nothing to show off, its hard to let go of something that finally comes up your way.
You cling on to something or someone, that one hope towards the light.
That person for me was Kumi Ishikawa,
who made me find a writer in me.
I didn't brainstorm or had to think a heck lot for how I wanted her to be.
It all came out naturally, within a span of 10 minutes I had known how my Kumi Ishikawa was going to be.
The perfect person I always wanted or dreamed about, Somehow I saw such a person in that girl I met in my class.
And so by the end of Chapter 9 of "Life is a cherry blossom tree", I had fallen in love again, fallen immensely, deeply, passionately in love with a person who didn't exist, or perhaps she did who knows?
That girl in my class wasn't that girl, she was just a real-life figure of that girl I wanted or dreamed about, but she wasn't the one.
The one I fell in love with existed only in mind.
But it didn't matter, I had started healing.
Seems pretty confusing right?
I don't blame you, It took me a heck of a lot of time to realise this myself.
Reading all of this might seem very cinematic but it wasn't.
The fuel to this story and to my real life was given by a beautiful movie called "Kimi no na wa."
A movie, that I watched almost every day while writing this story and even after that.
My life was full of adrenaline rush back then.
I would wake up to those treacherous sunny mornings which seemed as beautiful as waking up on a meadow full of pine trees.
The sweat across my forehead would seem like tiny drops of heaven falling from the sky, that much happy I was then.
Kimi no na wa, would make me a little kid every morning, the kid full of every emotion just ready to flourish, whether it be love, hatred, happiness or sadness, and if I had to emphasize on something
then it's love.
So that's what happened. Seeing Mitsuha and Taki's story almost every day made me believe in my own love.
You know I think love is underrated.
People don't really know what love is and so they curse it.
Love is as beautiful as a sweet whisper of wind on your face every morning, as calm as a kiss under the moonlight.
And so, Love it was which hit me again with full force, but only because I allowed it to.
And I healed, healed faster than the bullet trains running in Tokyo as of now.
Healed faster than the time a raindrop takes to fall on my cheek on a rainy evening.
And that's how I spent the best summer of my life in a long long time.
A much-needed summer to find myself, to love again, to love myself.
And it wouldn't have been possible without any of you guys, the one's who are reading.
Especially the real life Yuto and Hayate, who made me realise that I didn't have to stray far from reality to find interesting characters.
And of course, to the real life version of Kumi Ishikawa, Thank you.
You did so much for me without even doing anything, and for that, I'll be forever grateful to you.
The moral of this story is that at the end of the day, its love that will save you, its love that will give you the much needed light, the much needed hope, and that love could be anything.
The trick is to find that love, believe in it, and keep a part of it inside you always, let it light a fire inside you, the fire that will replenish every emotion in your body and boom! You're alive again, you're born again.
That's what Kimi no na wa taught me, that's what my own story- the one I crafted with all the love and warmth I could find in this world, my most prized posession-Life is a Cherry Blossom tree, taught me.
That's what Kumi taught me, My Kumi, my version of Kumi.
How "Kimi no na Wa" & "Life is a Cherry Blossom Tree" made me spend the best summer of my life.
You know there are certain things, or basically most of the things that you don' plan but it happens nevertheless,
like a gush of wild wind blowing away at your face, indicating its presence, indicating its heavy presence.
Depression hit me just like that, outta nowhere at my darkest hour more than a year ago.
The time, to be precise the day when my girlfriend broke up with me, the day one of my closest friends died, and my so-called best friend abandoned me.
Seems pretty rough right? Trust me, it wasn't that bad, In fact, I didn't feel a thing, to be honest.
Things just happened and I didn't know how to react, my body failed me that day and I believe I was immune to every emotion this world has to offer.
Fast forward to this year, the late winter was trying to scare us away with its coldness and Spring was trying it's hard to spread life, spread life into me.
And so I met her, outta nowhere.
The person, the girl responsible for my redemption was just another ordinary girl in my class, Sitting alone, reading a book as if just like me, the real world people didn't interest her.
And so she interests me.
Back in the day, I had just started this blog and creating stories were my first priority, maybe that was my chance to Redemption I thought?
Seeing her, her eyes, the way she moved, the way she laughed, the way she behaved and most importantly her voice, that voice, made me feel something I hadn't felt for anyone in about 4 years.
Was it love? I have no idea since I didn't know her.
You can't fall in love with a person you don't know.
This was something else.
Who was she?
She was my Kumi Ishikawa.
The same Kumi Ishikawa that gave birth to a so-called story "Life is a cherry Blossom tree", Kumi Ishikawa which made me revive a person called Rin Kobayashi.
And so one summer evening, when I missed her.
I imagined a version of her in my mind, an alternate reality which I penned down on a piece of paper in my parent's bedroom back at home.
That was the very first night in months, I had a good sleep.
You know when you believe you are a talentless piece of crap with absolutely nothing to show off, its hard to let go of something that finally comes up your way.
You cling on to something or someone, that one hope towards the light.
That person for me was Kumi Ishikawa,
who made me find a writer in me.
I didn't brainstorm or had to think a heck lot for how I wanted her to be.
It all came out naturally, within a span of 10 minutes I had known how my Kumi Ishikawa was going to be.
The perfect person I always wanted or dreamed about, Somehow I saw such a person in that girl I met in my class.
And so by the end of Chapter 9 of "Life is a cherry blossom tree", I had fallen in love again, fallen immensely, deeply, passionately in love with a person who didn't exist, or perhaps she did who knows?
That girl in my class wasn't that girl, she was just a real-life figure of that girl I wanted or dreamed about, but she wasn't the one.
The one I fell in love with existed only in mind.
But it didn't matter, I had started healing.
Seems pretty confusing right?
I don't blame you, It took me a heck of a lot of time to realise this myself.
Reading all of this might seem very cinematic but it wasn't.
The fuel to this story and to my real life was given by a beautiful movie called "Kimi no na wa."
A movie, that I watched almost every day while writing this story and even after that.
My life was full of adrenaline rush back then.
I would wake up to those treacherous sunny mornings which seemed as beautiful as waking up on a meadow full of pine trees.
The sweat across my forehead would seem like tiny drops of heaven falling from the sky, that much happy I was then.
Kimi no na wa, would make me a little kid every morning, the kid full of every emotion just ready to flourish, whether it be love, hatred, happiness or sadness, and if I had to emphasize on something
then it's love.
So that's what happened. Seeing Mitsuha and Taki's story almost every day made me believe in my own love.
You know I think love is underrated.
People don't really know what love is and so they curse it.
Love is as beautiful as a sweet whisper of wind on your face every morning, as calm as a kiss under the moonlight.
And so, Love it was which hit me again with full force, but only because I allowed it to.
And I healed, healed faster than the bullet trains running in Tokyo as of now.
Healed faster than the time a raindrop takes to fall on my cheek on a rainy evening.
And that's how I spent the best summer of my life in a long long time.
A much-needed summer to find myself, to love again, to love myself.
And it wouldn't have been possible without any of you guys, the one's who are reading.
Especially the real life Yuto and Hayate, who made me realise that I didn't have to stray far from reality to find interesting characters.
And of course, to the real life version of Kumi Ishikawa, Thank you.
You did so much for me without even doing anything, and for that, I'll be forever grateful to you.
The moral of this story is that at the end of the day, its love that will save you, its love that will give you the much needed light, the much needed hope, and that love could be anything.
The trick is to find that love, believe in it, and keep a part of it inside you always, let it light a fire inside you, the fire that will replenish every emotion in your body and boom! You're alive again, you're born again.
That's what Kimi no na wa taught me, that's what my own story- the one I crafted with all the love and warmth I could find in this world, my most prized posession-Life is a Cherry Blossom tree, taught me.
That's what Kumi taught me, My Kumi, my version of Kumi.
0 comments: